Improvement.

Failure can be interpreted a lot of ways, but it really sucks when they all apply to you; and how appropriate that Crash and Burn would be playing right now, but unfortunately the part of not being alone kinda doesn't apply, because everything that's wrong is kinda only up to me, but it's always nice to have support. I just need to find some.

I used to wish I was rich, wish I was talented, wish I was meant for something bigger than everything in my life, and now I'm kinda tired of wishing. So guess what? Time to screw everything else that's not important in my life and concentrate on what is, because I need to get my priorities straight. It'd probably be in my best interest to toss my laptop out of the window, but I think that'd probably be more hurt than help.

I have other problems, but if I were to elaborate on it I'd probably draft this post too, and I've been doing that a lot recently, so I guess I'll actually post something.

Big surprise that tomorrow's probably an "Ignore Chris Day". and I might as well acknowledge this, because...well....it's kinda hard not to? but yeah. If you read this, and I honestly have no idea if you will or not, I'm sorry I'm not going with you, but I'm not sorry I said no, because I like to think I'm allowed that choice, yeah? And what everyone says is right, you deserve someone better :] I'm pretty sure I've told you that before, but yeah....I'm pretty sure this ordeal will probably change things, especially with people like Alice who hate me right now, but it doesn't on my side, so do what you like.

On the bright side a hecka lot of birthday's coming up :] which means lots of money spending. Oh well, friends are worth it :] esp. the keepers. hopefully you know who you are. and if you don't....well......you are (:

Time for bed now. g'night.

-Chris

p.s. Alice, if you're reading this. If you're still looking for your i-pod, seriously, ask Improta if you haven't already.

Two Bubbles.

Alright, so I guess I'll just tell everyone now and let it trickle down to whoever else cares. I have currently lost my 4.0 to math anal. so yeah. no pretty robe at graduation, less scholarships, you get it. This really kills my perception of sophomore year though. It's like when you have a great day and one little big thing goes wrong, and it spoils it, because you just can't get over it. I've had polo, formal, fall play, but now sophomore year is the year I got my first B in highschool. horray.

It kinda sucks...knowing you're stupider than everyone else who isn't screwed like you are, and you get how other people feel when they get screwed like you did. And it's weird cuz we'll give other people answers for test, homework, etc, but when something like this happens everyone who's better knows that deep down they're happy because it's better for them. and I don't blame you, it's natural? I guess?

It's still depressing though, cuz now I feel stupid. and not to be conceited or anything, but I've never been BAD at math. so yeah. I'm very disappointed with myself right now. stupidstupidstupid.

and another thing --x Park gave my parents a "Warning" about the class at the beginning of the school year that a lot of people lose their 4.0's to Fierro, and it pisses me off to no end to be another one of her stupid little statistics, and have her be right. sigh.

On the bright side I suck at swim.

not too bright huh? that's the point.

I really hate hope too. like when I went into the comp and I had a chance to get an A-, but I needed to get 100%. I hate it. Why couldn't I just not have a chance at getting one and not hope and not be put down that much more. --x it just really ticks me off.

Then there's family. but let's not bring them into this right now --x or I think I'll commit suicide, which, besides being a hassle, is freaking expensive and messy. So if you ever decide to commit suicide, remember to leave some money behind for your funeral and crap, unless you want them to hate you when you're dead, because you're a selfish nincompoop.

I wonder if I'll draft this....

Stimulus Diffusion.

Wow...pretty good Thai song that my friend posted [x interesting how Pop Culture really DOES go everywhere o.o like Perry said.

the MV's weird, and the girl reminds me of Tiff at her China photoshoots [x

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TV8TWOyiqKE&feature=related

My Life. Thank you very much

So it's comps. and there's formal. and there's stress. and there's sleep deprivation everywhere. So I'm gonna blog.

It's really hard accepting you have a B. Like, I never thought I'd have to, but it's really hard. Surprisingly hard ): but when you get over it, school really doesn't feel like such a poopy hole anymore, because you realize life goes on after school, and even if you don't have a 4.0. So, thanks to God for that. I guess it's for the best.

This semester's been really interesting. I kinda feel like writing anonymous notes to people. I think I will :/

I really love Hall. i really do. She's like one of those people you can tell your little childish problems to, and she'll laugh, and then she'll help you fix them in some magical way that makes 150% sense, and you walk away feeling good. I would, except for the fact that so many people already do, and yeah...I don't really know how to elaborate on that, but I still think she's a great person :]

You know, thinking about kids makes you appreciate your parents so much more. You think about how eventually you're gonna be a parent, and if your kids are gonna turn out ok. Then you wonder how you're going to make them like you while raising them to be good people too. And then I wonder if I really want my kids to act like me. :[ and that makes me a little sad.

Formal + Not being a 100% legal driver = problems D; just FYI everyone out there!!! Senior year should be easier [x

You know what? I'm melting in here -___- I think I'm gonna go turn on the ceiling fan. in January. this is weird. or maybe it's just me.

"God made girls ice-cubes" (for the most part)

-Chris Platt

Why did New have to go and get Old?

Well, it's 2010 now (: I have no idea what it means except more of the best times of my life, and that's worth looking forward to. :]

I'm not gonna make resolutions to blog more, I'm not gonna make resolutions to clean my room, because I have more important people and stuff to worry about this year, so they get priority. Don't you guys feel special (;

Anyways, I think Park's succeeding in making me think about college and making me realize that it's closer than I think and that I need to prep for it. So props to you, but I still don't like you -_- you meanie face. iono she's just very cold >.> I wonder how she'll treat her kid.

Nothing much is going on. PE has gotten more boring :[ and I can't wait for swim season. I also can't wait to get my fat butt into shape again --x because I seriously suck right now. I'm not fat, but in a few weeks that could change. I'm joining CAC ASAP. Anyone care to join me? *coughaliceqianxiaozuoGASP* (:

And of course, how can I forget formal :] and the fact that I get to go with this really nice, really fun, amazingly pretty girl named Marissa Fierro! :O :D hehe sorry I couldn't help it ^-^ anyways. I just failed a math test though :/ so I better watch out. [x

Talent Show is coming up too! and I'm really scared for our class cuz it's literally next week and we're kinda -____- yeah......good luck to me, and C/o 2012 (:

2 last things:

-I want my webcam back mom! D;

-I really like this febreze my sister got me for Christmas <3

deep post to come :]

and I don't feel lonely anymore (:

Love The Fish

Yesterday was a very productive day (: I did absolutely no homework and downloaded 18 songs. I haven't gotten music in a LONG time o.o and I just remembered to download 3 because I just thought about Isabel and that I STILL owe her her card/gift thing >.<>

So auditions were today (x and I can honestly, no crap attatched, say that that was my worst audition in my entire life, but we'll see how it goes. My singing was ok, but my lines SUCEKD xD it's not even funny. I'm glad I've been in other productions so they know I can act, or I'd be screwed (x

Only math homework tonight, so I'm sure I'll find something to waste my life on :D and now I'm finished with math. wow this is weird -___- I seriously need to learn to concentrate on one thing, cuz I've been on this blog post all day xD oh well. nothing important to say on this post anyway.

Oh! so in Athletics there's a Lesbian Competition between Claudine and Archie, so I'm gonna keep an update on my blog until the end of the year of the scores :] (the one with the most score loses/is more lesbian) so yeah right now it's...

Archie: 6

Claudine: 2

So we'll see how that goes. I really should start typing with colors again. it's really pretty =] and it makes the post look better than it really is (x

oh by the way...

Congratulations to Alice and Catherine :D

On an awesome win for their first soccer game of the season! Make last year soccer look as bad as you possibly can :D winning all of them would be kinda nice too, but really friggin' good job ladies =D and Catherine. Good Job on your buttmark/scratch/battlemark/scar thing (x I know you love it.

bye~

Tears of Fire

Life Lessons

1.When it rains it pours

Why is it that when it rains it pours? it's never one thing that goes wrong at a time, it's always ALL OF THEM. AT THE SAME TIME. BURYING YOU IN FREAKING MISERY. and it sucks :[ it really does. but then what do you do? you have to get up and keep going cuz doing something stupid like committing suicide. Then you're just being some scared little baby who doesn't want to face the world.

But sometimes it's hard to, especially when you don't have much to look forward to when you get back up.

2. You never know what you have until it's gone.

So freaking true it's not even funny. I'd rather not go into this though.

3. A true friend is hard to find.

Also very true, and kinda heartbreaking. It makes you feel really stupid when you trust someone who you shouldn't have. it just doesn't work very well.

4. If something's going to go wrong, it'll go wrong at the worst possible time.

or maybe it's just me.